If she stays long enough, she will find out what the underlying facts are that cause her to keep picking this kind of guy, time after time. He already knows about your past relationships Unless you just met him and bonded instantly, he's probably seen — or at least heard about — your dating disasters of the past. Then we are between a rock and a hard place. Healthy individuals will wait for a long time and a lot of information before offering a commitment — not three weeks. She just needs to be sick and tired of being sick and tired. Is he not concerned about his personal hygiene such as not cutting his hair, trimming his nails and or having a clean house? Keep loving her and supporting her and eventually she will meet the right guy. If he really loved her, he would not do those things.
She has been blogging for over four years and writing her whole life. Yes,I have a wonderful, beautiful 23 year old daughter from a previous marriage, I divorced her father when she was 3 yrs old that has done this same thing. He has fought us in every parenting decision we have made concerning our daughter — for six years. I hope counseling helps your daughter because i really don't have an answer of how to make her see your point. An abusive partner will tell you that no one else will love you because you are fat, ugly, stupid — pick a word.
The other thing was she needed to be needed and needed to have a boyfriend. You have encouraged her to get counseling and she is doing so. She needs believe she deserves better. It is better to let her figure things out on her own before you tell her what you think. Sign 4: He Lets You Support Him No matter how affectionate he is, do not allow your boyfriend to live with you and not pay at least half of the rent and shared expenses. She has all her eggs in a Loser basket and for that reason can think of few options each time she leaves.
Let me give you signs ur dating a loser please tell the guy that you are going to cut off all ties and communication him and let him know,if he tried to contact you that he will be blocked. You may offer your advice to your friend, and it may or may not be accepted. I finally gave up Mr exciting- bad boy and went for a stable nice guy. If you don't even know a person, have only texted a dozen lines, or spoken on the phone and the conversation goes straight to sex, or 'everything' you say he does too, probably not a good sign. Give her the time she needs and allow the newness of the relationship to wear off. He has mooched off of my ex-husband by living with him for 6 months rent free.
Continue to be patient with her. Sometimes all a woman needs is to vent. Than get her to write down the things she likes about him and the things she doesn't. Are you feeling left out and neglected? Creative losers often create so much social pressure that the victim agrees to go back to the bad relationship rather than continue under the social pressure. The more my parents told me not to see him it pushed me closer to him.
For example, if you're both psyched about the outdoors, a hike will never be boring. As you said, she is a smart girl. Is the boyfriend or girlfriend a bad influence on your friend? She has been the soul support for her family for the 13 yrs they have been together. What is it about this person that bothers you? The truth is, when it comes to dating and relating, there really are very few black and white answers. He has his own pad… in his parents' basement. I have had many talks with her and have exhausted all efforts but will never give up on her. I pray for her to get out off this relationship, soon! Not that I think you are doing that! She was just an absolute loser magnet.
So I did it, I broke it off with him, it was not pretty but I did it. They may threaten physical violence, show weapons, or threaten to kill you or themselves if you leave them. Legacy Loser Often, girls are stuck with a loser due to personal history. He was good at math until they added in the alphabet. One great question to ask her in the midst of her rant: why do you love him? Or, if you say too much too soon it could potentially backfire and your friend may get angry with you. She is ready for you to meet him. His approach was far more effective with me.
I always said I held our family together with spit and toilet paper. As she sees other men his age working, with a family, focusing on a career, she will come to realize that he is, after all, a Loser. If you fear violence or abuse, check local legal or law enforcement options such as a restraining order. If you have any questions about me or about my services please feel free to ask! During the detachment phase you should… Observe the way you are treated. These things end very quickly if you leave them alone. Drive because of a health condition and I will say this Adam and I were at a point we're I felt no danger letting him in so we made plans like a week ahead he came over as planned we watched.
I did ask my girls why they thought they were'nt worthy of a decent man and that made them start thinking! Remember, if your prize dog jumps the fence and escapes, when you get him back you build a higher fence. If he does not show any type of empathy about your difficult life events he will have a hard time showing that to your family and friends. Most of my clients are willing to go from man to man just to ensure they are not sleeping alone at night. I look back and feel awful of what I put my parents through. My philosophy is that all girls need to date at least one jerk so they recognize a good guy when he comes. All I can say is do not give up on your daughter, let her know you love her no matter what.
Let me know if you want to hear more along these lines. Does he not open the door, walk on the outside of the street, or volunteer to make your life a little easier? She enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun. What I haven't seen is any advice about the boyfriend. Instead, talk to him about how you feel and be firm that you are uncomfortable dating or living with someone that is unemployed or broke or lazy. You sound like an amazingly supportive mom. Just imagine him as a partner, just one time, and see if your perception changes a bit. Can he not be sympathetic to your needs and wants? I tried to return to college it would be thousands in loans Im not getting into that at my age! He can't keep a job, he doesn't own or rent, he now lives with a cousin, he doesn't have any money, he continues to lie to her.